Random Excuse from Tippy Toe

Here's the history of Tippy Toe: She's 23, she has a kid, unwed baby-mama with multiple male suitors (none of which are the father). The current boy toy is Oliver Twist. She explains to everyone EVERYTHING about him in the lunch room. Even if you're just discussing something random like....Nicolas Cage -> she will somehow relate it back to her and Oliver Twist. She also never comes to work in any type of inclement weather. Here's a sample of a random excuse:

"oh my boyfriend said this and my kid did this and my car broke down cuz a brand new audi backed into me at the bank and totalled my car. and while my dad was trying to fix it cuz he's a mechanic i drove it into the guard rail, so i cant come to work"

Well, we did some investigative work. We circled the parking lots and found tippy toe's ride w/ not apparent damage.